Win-Win I like

I like board games. I really do. Even so, I don't play it often and I was reminded why the other night.

I am an idealistic person. I have my own view on about almost everything and I tend to envision things in the perfect, but unfortunately unrealistic, form. And when my idealism is disturbed, I become uneasy. That's exactly what happened the other night. One simple board game got my brain all worked up, reflecting on the idealism I hold.

Me and a few other friends were playing a board game called Ticket to Ride. Before you go any further in this reading, I would suggest that you take the time to read the overview of the game because then only you'll understand what I'm going to talk about. To do so, please click here

Done? Okay. Now we can move on.

When playing, I always have only one thing in mind: to accomplish the missions that were set by the cards that I was dealt with. That night I wanted to accomplish 2 missions: one mission is to build a train track from Seattle to Los Angeles, and another is from Los Angeles to New York. So we were playing and I was busy doing my own moves and minding my own business. Pick cards... drop cards... build tracks... pick cards... drop cards... build tracks... Building building building... And then I hear a friend of mine whispering to another (Yes I have quite a sharp hearing when I'm being attentive) trying to set up a plan to block my train route and my heart went "Here we go again..." Sure enough, they put two of their trains on my train route.

Have you ever seen one of those "Before-After" ads in magazines, showing one's transformation from before they use a certain product/service to after they use it?
Below is the transformation that my face went through from before my route was blocked to after:

  BEFORE                   AFTER
o(=^__^=)o   ==>   o(~___~"")o

My "before" face literally turned into the "after" face in the count of nanoseconds.
And yes, it is for ALL to see - something that I'm not very proud of.
As I have said in "Me...Summarized", I wear my heart on my sleeve. I show what I feel inside on the outside. It's on auto-pilot mode. Like everything else, it comes with its own advantages and disadvantages. One advantage is people won't have to guess whether or not I'm happy. When I'm happy, I have happy face and happy gestures. The disadvantage is, when I'm not, they don't have to guess it either. I am as transparent as a person could get. I admit I have a lot of work to be done in this department. It is still under construction. Trust me, I'm trying my best to get it done ASAP.

Okay, back to the subject matter being discussed - I can't deny I was very irritated and upset.
"Why so serious?" some of you might ask because afterall, it is just a board game.
Yes, I know that, but I do think that board games do have some reflections of the real world, which is one of the reasons why they are so fun to play. I'll use Monopoly as an illustration. Over the years, efforts has been made in order to make Monopoly a more realistic game. For example, they use real places, there is hydro companies, trains, jails, rewards and punishments, debit cards are used in place of cash etcetera. Monopoly has always been a fun game to play, but when it gets more realistic, the game gets that much more fun!

I personally think that there is more to board games than just games. There are many that we could learn from it. One thing that I personally believe in, they bring out the characters of the players on the table.
Perhaps because of such thoughts on board games that I apply my "real world" idealism whenever I play.

Below are a few of the principles that I live by:
1. Nobody could step on other people's head to move up and not find him/herself running out of heads to step on one day.
    It's pretty self-explanatory. Why try to step on each others' heads when we can all work together for the betterment of all? We can only go so far stepping on heads.
I consider the relationships I have with others as imperative and  significant. If I have to put it into a formula, the quality of my relationship with others will be directly proportional to the rate of my success. People are more important than things. I wouldn't want to risk the relationships I have with others just so I can go one step ahead. If that makes me less rich and "successful" than the others, then it'd be fine by me. One thing I'm sure of is that I know I won't be less happy nor less peaceful. What good is my life if it only brings misery upon others'?

2. If thou are not disturbed by me, then thou shall not disturb me. Vice versa.
    As I said, I was doing my own thing and minding my own business. I have not a single plan in my head to disturb the others. All I wanted to do was to accomplish my missions. It's a different story if my route was cut by someone who has to pass that route in order to accomplish their mission. In that case, I wouldn't mind at all. What I find hard to accept is that someone would actually go out of their way and step on other people's toe purposely in order to get ahead. What good does it bring anyway? Now they have less train to complete more missions, less train to make their train track the longest and I don't get to finish my mission. It's a lose-lose strategy. I can't help but wonder, whatever happened to healthy, cooperative competition?

3. Do not do unto others what thou hate to be done unto.
If you expect other people not to cut your track, or do some other horrible things to you, and actually hate it when they do it, then by all means, please don't do it to them. Karma is an ancient and well-known concept, and it's been proven time and again to be true.

Believe it or not, I was not upset because I was losing, but because in my little idealistic world I expect others to follow the same rules. I like peace. I value peace. And I don't like it when people disturb it.
But who am I kidding right? Afterall, we live in a world that operates mostly on the Lose-Win principle. Most people believe that someone has to lose for somebody else to win and this is reflected in board games. It always hits me with the reality that not everyone is going to play nice, and that's what makes me uneasy, thus why I don't play it much.

With that being said, however, it is important to remember that all those principles are merely the expectations that I have on other people and myself, based on my own idealism. Obviously, what others do is something that is out of my range of control. We are all humans in the end, each with our own imperfections. It is guaranteed that our toes will be stepped on, either purposely or not, by one or two people that we meet in life. I guess the best I can do with such events is to shake off the dust, extend the grace that has been granted unto me to the others, and move on.
I guess I have yet a lot to learn on setting realistic expectations on others and myself. Sure I can have a set of principles that I live by, but I also have to be flexible and expand my level of tolerance for errors.

If there is any of my board game mates reading this blog, I hope you are not taking any offence from this writing. With all sincerety, I don't have the slightest intention to offend anyone. I am not directing this writing towards anybody in particular. This writing is merely an expression of the thoughts that I have on the matter in general. It does not change the love I have for board games or the love I have for playing it with you guys. I'm looking forward to our next session of games! =)

♥
LMP